7 August 2013

If You Find Me by Emily Murdoch

If You Find Me by Emily Murdoch
Publisher: Indigo
Publication Date: May 2nd 2013
Source: Bought


A broken-down camper hidden deep in a national forest is the only home fifteen-year-old Carey can remember. The trees keep guard over her threadbare existence, with the one bright spot being Carey's younger sister, Jenessa, who depends on Carey for her very survival. All they have is each other, as their mentally ill mother comes and goes with greater frequency. Until that one fateful day their mother disappears for good, and the girls are found by their father, a stranger, and taken to re-enter the "normal" life of school, clothes and boys. 

Now, Carey must come to terms with the truth of why their mother spirited them away ten years ago, while haunted by a past that won't let her go ... a dark past that hides many a secret, including the reason Jenessa hasn't spoken a word in over a year. Carey knows she must keep her sister close, and her secrets even closer, or risk watching her new life come crashing down.

Wow. This book was so powerful and moving. It dealt with a lot of pretty tough subjects, but Emily Murdoch did a fantastic job of writing them.

Carey was such a fantastic character. She was strong and determined after everything that had happened in the woods. She was extremely protective of her sister and wanting nothing more than to make Jenessa happy. I really loved the relationship between the two sisters. They had shared so much and been through so much together in the woods that their bond was unbreakable.

Jenessa was such a cutie. She was protecting Carey by keeping her secret, which was extremely sweet of her to do. But keeping Carey's secret caused Jenessa to become silent and only talk to Carey in whispers. It was lovely to see Jenessa coming out of her shell in her new home and starting to relax.

I was slightly apprehensive of their father to begin with because of the reaction Carey had towards him. There was some doubt in my mind that maybe her mother had been lying, but then again, maybe she hadn't. He genuinely cared for these girls though and had spent years and years looking for them. It was beautiful to see them all reunited.

The more we learned about Carey's mother, the more I started to hate her. She was manipulative, abusive and forced Carey into doing so horrible things. I honestly couldn't imagine being in that kind of situation. My heart ached for Carey.

Discovering Carey's secret was a big part of this novel. I kind of half guessed what happened, but the actual event was traumatizing. I found it extremely hard to read about that night and everything that happened to Carey and Jenessa. I applaud Carey for doing what she did. I know it was wrong, but she had to do it to survive and to protect Jenessa. 

The ending was sweet with the exchanges between Carey and her father. They became even closer after Carey told him everything and I really loved that he didn't pull away from her and that he pulled her in closer.

Overall, this was such a heart-wrenching novel. I really felt for the characters and I was so pulled into this powerful storyline.
I definitely recommend reading this book, but be warned, there are some very difficult scenes and it deals with some touchy subjects. 


  1. I think that my favourite thing about this book was the relationship between the sisters. I'm really glad you enjoyed this one..if enjoyed is the right word! It's such a heart-wrenching yet beautiful book. Lovely review!

    1. It definitely was. It was the thing that the whole book revolved around. They were so important to each other.
      I did enjoy it. It was such a beautifully moving book :)

  2. Yes, I'm happy you liked it so much. This book was so heartbreaking, but I love how hopeful it was as the same time :) The characters are just perfect.


    1. It was! But they had the chance at a happy ending with a proper loving family which I enjoyed. They were finally getting what they deserved after everything that happened to them. It was sweet and heartbreaking at the same time.

  3. I love heartfelt sibling relationships in my books. I am intrigued about what these girls have gone through and I guess I will have to read the book now. Thanks for the review!

    1. It's such a beautiful and tragic novel. The girls are so close because of what happened to them, and it was lovely reading about their relationship. :)